There has to be something more to life than this. I feel life has been a series of pulling the short stick as "THEY" say. At 32 I am pretty much sick of "them". Whoever "They" are.
Tired of the broken hearts and empty dreams.
Watching the clouds drift by on this sunny afternoon reminds me of watching my dreams slowly drift past me. Dreams we have when we are little. What we think we are going to do with our lives. But how what I thought I once might do seems so out of reach. Dreams they come and go. But waiting for the next one can sometimes seem so distant from where you may be standing, like from my perspective right now.
True (finish my sentence) Love seem so distant and beyond reach.
Reaching for something and thinking that's what you want. Convincing yourself that what your grasping onto is real. Well life is made up of a lot of things that crumble before us.
Sometimes what your looking at is your imagination exaggerating what you've always dreamed of and convinced yourself that what you wanted is right in front of you. The real deal or your imagination? Your the only one who can figure it out.
I don't want to be fool-hearted but I am. A hopeless romantic with lots of broken dreams and empty hearts, pretty much what I am left with at the end of the day is whatever I make of it. REAL or IMAGINE.
Your honesty is what makes you special. It is hard to write certain things in public, as it is not fitting to do so, since it is more of a private word. But I will say this: I have observed, in my own life, that all the good we seek in this life is to be found in God. There are no shortcuts to growing in faith and there is no growth that does not come out of serious commitment, in any relationship. So, as I read your honest but sad words, as a friend, I would encourage you to hold on tight to Jesus and to do more than hold on tight. I strongly encourage you to take bold steps in God, believing that He will bless those steps, as He always blesses them. Bold steps are actions that can be almost measured in zeal of love and commitment. Actions that will put you on the edge of adventure in God. The Bible says that The Kingdom of Heaven must be ceased aggressively. It does not come, we do not grow through mamby-pamby, warm and fuzzy hopes and wishes and sentimental thoughts. As Christians, we grow in the furnaces of life and in the shadows of sadness. Those furnaces and shadows, unpleasant as they are, must not be avoided, else we will not grow in faith and in our relationship with Jesus. My advice, as a friend and fellow Christian, is to cease hold of faith, so much so that you can feel it. Put yourself "out there" for Jesus and stay committed to Him, in all ways. Take action. Take actions. Don't avoid the hard places and times but go through them holding tightly to His Hand. You will soon find that your heart is lighter and your outlook much improved. I have observed that, when I get lazy in my Christian walk, I begin to feel lousy in all areas. I am praying for you all the time.
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